Ryoma's Diary
by darkandmorbid
Summary: When Ryoma's Di...er...Journal is 'acidentally' discovered by his friends, what will happen?
1. Chapter 1

Morbid: Hello There, this is our first POT fic...

Dark: hehe...POT...anyway..this probably extreamly OOC

Morbid: But thats what makes it fun!

Disclaimer: I dont even own my cat, he owns me, so how could i own POT. hehe POT.

Dark: wait...does that mean that Karupin owns Ryoma?

Morbid: Hmm...oh the possibilities...anyway, on with the show! er...fic...

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Chapter 1 

Disturbing Discoveries

_Dear Diary, _

_Today was a horrible day. Momo almost beat me again. I'm so depressed now. I think I'll go talk to the cat. Karupin always makes me feel better. He's the only one I truly love. He truly cares about me from the bottom of his kitty soul. _

At that exact moment, his door burst open to reveal the object of his disdain and Inui. Ryoma 'subtlety' shoved his 'journal' under a stack of papers on his desk.

"How did you get in my house?" Ryoma asked with a raised brow.

"Oh that, some old pervert let us in." Momo said cheerfully.

"Baka dad." Ryoma muttered to himself turning away from his desk.

"Hmm Ryoma's father is a pervert. This is very interesting data. I must write it down." Inui said pulling out his ever faithful data notebook causing Ryoma to shoot him a death glare, which he blatantly ignored.

After finishing his notes Inui looked up at Ryoma thoughtfully. "Ryoma, would you please go and get Momo and me drinks."

"Yeah, I'm dying of thirst over here!" Momo chimed in.

Ryoma shot them both a look that said 'aren't you the ones that burst into my house?'

"You know, I do have a new vitamin shake ready for testing." Inui said sugestively.

"I'm going I'm going" Ryoma said trying to look cool whilst practically running for the door.

After Ryoma vacated the premises Momo glanced at Inui with a grin. "You're evil. Now, what did he push under those.." He started only to have Inui beat him to the punch by triumphantly pulling a small plum colored notebook out of the once stacked stack of papers.

"Now what have we here? I'm sure it's full of 'interesting' data." Inui said grinning sadistically at Momo. Momo pulled up a seat next to Inui and they both began to read

_Dear Diary_

_Today was a bad day. I discovered that no one loves me. Well no one but my beloved Karupin. He will always remain faithful._

Momo and Inui look at each other with raised eyebrows and continue on in sadistic merriment.

_Dad beat me for the 1,823 time today. I will beat that man if it's the last thing I ever do. Even if he's 83 and in a wheelchair on oxygen, I vow to beat him some day!_

At this point both boys burst into a fit of uncontrollable laughter causing Inui to fall off the bed, making Momo laugh even harder. Both of them finally calmed down and continued reading.

_Since I only started keeping track of my wins…well, my losses against my father about a month ago, I find these figures veeery depressing. Oh where is my beloved kitty to comfort me when I most need him. At the vet of course. Blast you all for denying me my precious!_

Momo looked at Inui. "I think he has issues about his cat…"

"You think? I believe there is a 100 percent chance you are correct on this matter."

Momo grinned at Inui with a mixture of amusement and disturbance "Ochibi needs therapy…"

At this moment Ryoma bumps open the door, hands full of carbonated beverages. Upon seeing his 'journal' in the hands of his enem…er friends he drops said carbonated beverages and makes a dive for it, only to have it jerked out of his reach and passed to Momo.

Ryoma shoots both boys death glares and Momo reluctantly hands over his Di..er 'journal' with a grin, and then both boys run for the door amidst Ryoma's shouts of 'friendship.'


	2. Chapter 2

Dark: Here's chapter two. 

Morbid: Thanks for reviewing! Please review again!

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Chapter 2 

Friendly Revelations

The next day before tennis practice, two teammates where seen whispering to the side of the court and throwing smirks at the youngest member of the regulars.

Ryoma shot them evil glares as a group of his fan girls approached. Inui grinned sadistically and approached them. Ryoma, intent on ignoring the fan girls started to head in the opposite direction.

"You know, there is a 99.6 percent chance that if you were Himalayan that Ryoma would tolerate your presence." Inui said fixing his glasses.

This comment causes Ryoma to turn a strange shade of pink which of course could not be a blush, for Ryoma obviously does not blush.

Momo, seeing said pink coloring, shouted at the top of his lungs "You should all cosplay cats! And then he would defiantly date you!"

Ryoma shoots yet another glare at his senpias and stomps off angrily, for he's surely not embarrassed, towards the locker rooms to change for practice.

Later that day Ryoma was having a practice match with Fuji when a few of his balls went decidedly astray hitting his unsuspecting teammates in various places. When one of his serves knocks Inui into his 'vitamin supplement' juice, Fuji gave Ryoma a look that said 'your doing that on purpose, I can tell.'

"Sorry, its an off day." Ryoma said unemotionally.

"Ochibi can have off days!?" Eiji said dramatically looking at Ryoma. The team seemed unaware of the fact that Inui was now unconscious and drowning in his own juice. Tezuka obviously seemed to think it was payback of some sort and they deserved it, so he left the situation alone.

After practice Ryoma went to change, and a very curious Fuji approached the conspiring victims of Ryoma's 'off day'. "So you two, what did you do to Ryoma? Threaten to Neuter his cat or something?"

Inui and Momo looked at Fuji semi-incredulously "How did you...never mind."

"Oh now, this seems interesting, really what did you two do?" Fuji asked with a smile.

Inui and Momo looked at each other debating without words on how bad Ryoma would hurt them if they divulged his secret. After a heated mental debate and a bit more prodding, they caved and spilled the whole story to Fuji.

"Hmm, a diary you say….now that sounds interesting. I might just have to pay our dear Ochibi a visit." He said grinning sadistically, his blue eyes sparkling.

After arriving at Ryoma's and being waved in by some old pervert, he went up the stairs and to Ryoma's domain. Upon entering, he discovered that Ochibi wasn't home, much to his initial disappointment. Then he had an idea. A wonderful awful idea. Searching under the papers on the desk, he found the described purple 'journal'. Tearing out a blank page, he began to write. Then with a malicious grin, he grabs up the Di…er 'journal' and calmly walks out of the house.

* * *

Later that night Ryoma returned from a game of one on wall, (Sad to say, the wall won.), to find Karupin on his desk pawing through his papers. 

"Karupin…" 'What are you doing in here anyway, I thought I closed the door?' he thought to him self looking at the mess his kitty had made. Not that he really minded. It was just unusual for Karupin to make a mess. He was such a neat kitty. That was when he noticed Karupin was paying particular attention to one piece of paper.

He picked up the paper from under Karupin and began reading:

_Dear Ochibi, _

_I have taken your Di…er your journal ransom. In order for it to be returned you must tell me your deepest darkest secret. Oh wait. I already have your Di...journal. Well, I'll be in touch. Until then, just be grateful I didn't take the cat. _

_Yours truly,_

_Kidnapper_

After re-reading the ransom note for the thirtieth time, he frowned and picked up Karupin protectively.


	3. Chapter 3

Dark: Chapter Three!

Morbid: Please review! We give you cookies!

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Chapter 3

Death Threats

Ryoma stormed in to the Seigaku tennis club locker room long enough to grab the arms of his two 'favorite' senpias and drag them out the door. They were both in too much shock to offer any resistance.

"Where. Is. IT." Ryoma grated out glaring at the older boys. They both had looks of guilty confusion on there faces.

"Where is what Ochibi-chan?" Momo said looking as innocent as he possibly could.

"My Diar...JOURNAL!" Ryoma said with a look of pure hatred. (Can't you feel the love?)

"There is a 0.0001 percent chance that either one of us took your...journal." Inui said adjusting his glasses nervously.

"Then where. Is. It." Ryoma Glared at Momo furiously.

"Well…."

* * *

Meanwhile, in the locker room, Fuji cackled pulling out his prize and enjoying the fact that two others were being blamed for its disappearance at that very moment. Eiji , noticing this...semi-odd behavior from his teammate glanced over to see the book in his hands. Curious, he walked over. 

"What have you got there?" Eiji questioned drawing everyone's attention.

"Oh nothing much, just Echizen's life story. Want to read?" Fuji replied grinning sadistically. Almost everyone was curious, thought Kaidoh won't admit it and Kawamura was nervous about it until a racket found it's way into his hands.

"I don't think that's a…" Oishi said, but trailed off at Eiji's pleading look causing him to give in and come over to the gathering at the book. As a group, they began to read:

_Dear Diary,_

_Yesterday something even more horrible than I ever could have imagined happened. They found you. And read you Diary! I felt violated. All my senpias are pains._

This caused some to laugh and some to frown, and then they all turned back to the most interesting locker room reading they'd had in quite some time, maybe ever even.

_And some of them scare me, especially Egghead and the other. They are just a little to in sync for comfort, if you know what I mean. (You know who I mean Diary, and in case of another discovery, you're the only one who shall know who I mean, if you know what I mean) _

At this point everyone looks up, having come to a disturbing revelation about Ryoma's revelation, well, everyone but the Golden pair.

"Who is he talking about Oishi!? Do you know??" Eiji questions him, utterly clueless.

"I have no idea." Oishi responds, equally as clueless. These comments for some reason causes the other regulars to cast odd stares in their general directions, but Oishi chose to ignore those.

"Okay! Enough of this passage, lets see what he thought about us in the beginning of the school year." Kawamura, still holding the racket, said quickly grabbing the 'journal' and flipping towards the beginning.

_Dear Diary, _

_Today I joined the tennis team. Yes of course I made it. Though to do so, I had to beat this freaky snake guy. To be honest, he really scares me, I would never admit that to anyone other than you and Karupin of course. _

At this point everyone with the exception of Kaidoh burst into giggles. Kiadoh meanwhile couldn't understand how he managed to scare Ryoma whilst secretly being pleased about it.

Suddenly the locker room door burst open and Fuji grabbed the Dia…'Journal' just in time and stuffed it in his pack. A very peeved looking Ryoma stood in the doorway with a guilty and pained looking pair known as Inui and Momo trailing behind him. They were making frantic motions behind his back to Fuji. It was as if they were telling him to run away. Unfortunately for Fuji, he isn't fluent in sign language.

"Fuji-senpia." Ryoma said sweetly walking up to him. "WHERE. IS. IT!" Fuji just smiled and gave Ryoma his most innocent look.

Luckily for Fuji, Tezuka opened the door to the locker room and calmly stated "Last one out of the locker room owes me 50 laps." This caused a mad dash to the door, which led to several people becoming jammed and the whole team, with the exception of Ryoma who somehow wasn't noticed to be missing(running laps will do that), running laps as punishment for their stupidity upon exiting the locker rooms.

* * *

While everyone else was running laps, Ryoma, still in the locker room, emerges from the locker of a fellow teammate with a smirk after an unsuccessful mission into Fuji's pack(Apparently, Fuji fooled us all). 

"This is the key to the return of my Dia…journal." He said stuffing an object under his jacket and heading for home.


	4. Chapter 4

Morbid: Hi people, at least we assume you're people. Welcome to the last chapter of Ryoma's Diary.

Dark: If you love it, hate it, or even if you're indifferent please review!

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Chapter 4 

Pink flowers and Bunnies

Ryoma approaches the Tennis court, depressed yet hopeful. It was time for the meeting that would decide the fate of his Di…journal. He noticed a lone player hitting the tennis ball against the wall (he was beating the wall, hah). He walked up to the player, and waited for him to turn around.

"I have something you want." Ryoma said once the player noticed him.

"It was you Echizen? Why?"

"The team took something of mine and I want it back."

"Done." Tezuka said with a nod. "Do you want them to run laps as well?" he asked emotionlessly.

"Hmm…only if they resist." Ryoma said just as emotionlessly.

"We make the trade at sundown."

"Agreed." With this both participants in one of the most animated conversations either had ever had walked away.

* * *

Practice had ended and the Seigaku regulars were all cutting up in the locker room and enjoying some more 'quality reading'. Tezuka entered the room and calmly held out his hand over the Di…journal, his shadow looming and his frown glaring at them ominously. 

"Aww, do we really HAVE to?" Eiji whined. Tezuka said nothing, merely standing there waiting for one of them to hand him the book. After a moment of no action Tezuka lets out what almost sounds like a sigh, but of course couldn't be(because Tezuka does not sigh) and looks Fuji in the eye. "Now if you will, and I want 50 laps."

"But-"

"Fine, 100 laps, now hand over the book." Fuji reluctantly hands over his blackmail and heads out to run his laps.

"And as for the rest of you, I never want to hear of this again."

"But captain-"

"50 laps for all of you. Why are you still here?" Tezuka said raising an eyebrow. The team rose with a collective groan and headed out for their tourtu…I mean, training.

* * *

Sunset. Two silent figures meet on the empty tennis court, ready to exchange Dia…journals. 

"This never happened." Tezuka said in a monotone.

"Well….technically they haven't read your's…"

"500 laps" Tezuka said threateningly

"Pink flowers and bunnies." Ryoma replied.

"Fine. But if you tell anyone, you'll still be running laps when your grandchildren are born."

"Agreed."

And with that the two figures departed, both now in possession of his own personal Dia….journal.

**THE END... OR IS IT**

* * *

Ryoma shoves a stack of papers, also know as blackmail, into a box and pushed it under his bed. He then turn to his cat with his trademark grin. 

"Mada mada dane." Karupin meowed in agreement. Then they both exited the room.

**FIN**

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Morbid: Well, this is the end. Please review. 

Dark: We might to a sequel if enough people want one.


End file.
